In Loving Memory

To our beloved friend, family member, playmate, you will be missed but not forgotten. You were gentle and patient and loving. You were part of our family when we needed you most, and now your time had passed and we will hold our dear memories of you near to our hearts.
Dempsey, we love you and we miss you.

"It was time," Rob said to me this morning when I called him "after." That was all I needed to hear to know he was at peace with his decision. He called the vet late yesterday afternoon and made the appointment for 7:30 this morning, so as to avoid too much drama. I dropped the boys at day care today (usually a daddy duty) while Rob took Dempsey to the vet.

For those of you that don't know, Dempsey had a spinal nerve disease called degenerative myelopathy where the myelin tissue in a specific nerve group in a dog's spinal cord deteriorates. It is like MS in dogs (go figure). It is more common in certain breeds like boxers, dalmatians and German Shepherds. DM causes the nerve impulses from the brain to be unable to reach the dog's hind quarters. There is no treatment or cure for the disease. It progresses rapidly and is often not diagnosed until the later stages of the disease because the early symptoms are so similar to arthritis.

Dempsey had his first symptoms about 15 months ago, and by June of this year he was unable to walk. He managed to get around pretty well by pulling himself along with his front legs. The vet assured us that many dogs get along this way for quite some time, and since there is no pain associated with the disease, there would be no need to rush to a decision about putting the dog to sleep. But Dempsey, who had always loved to run, and was a star high jumper, stick chaser and backyard escape artist, was no longer his happy perky self. Maybe no pain, but there was definite sadness in his eyes. It is so hard to finally come to terms with what is in the best interest of your beloved pet, and my heart aches for Rob right now, but deep down he knew "it was time."

We didn't say anything to the boys. Palmer is young enough that he won't remember Dempsey, and likely will not even question why he isn't there anymore. Camden was the same age when we put Elvis to sleep, and it was a week later when he finally went to the closet where Elvis used to sleep and matter-of-factly said "all gone." Palmer is a fan of the phrase at the moment, so I anticipate it will be a similar situation with him in this case.

Camden knows Dempsey was old and sick. He was well aware that he couldn't play with Dempsey the way he used to. I had previously told him that there would come a day when Dempsey would not be with us anymore, and left it at that. I did not tell him last night or this morning that today was that day. In my heart of hearts I am hoping that he simply won't notice Dempsey's absence and will take it all in stride and not ask too many questions. Maybe in all his innocence, he will really understand that Dempsey is not with us anymore simply because "it was time."